Reasons

The "reasons not to run" list is long; over-tired, mentally exhausted, depleted, defeated.

Funny that the "reasons to run" list is exactly the same; because I am over-tired, mentally exhausted, depleted, and (most importantly) defeated.

What is Next?

Whoo boy!

I thought the post-race break would be nice. Some time off from getting up pre-pre-sunrise to weave through dark streets and trails. No grunting and groaning and arguing with the family over when is the best time to disappear for hours on end.

That was the plan anyway. Instead, it has turned into something much harder to manage than I expected. The wheels stopped turning and now I'm having a difficult time getting them moving again.

35 days post-race and I have lapsed.

Maybe not quite a lapse but a lull. Some silence that is becoming unwelcome.

I am quickly realizing that self-enforcement is not enough. Especially when my 6 month old keeps us up through the night. I'm the type that needs a race to keep me honest. I need it to give me a target and drag me out onto the dark streets to get a little closer to a better performance. I need to be afraid of my race.

I have to sign-up for something.

Fantastic song that I first heard while driving. 

Nearly had to pull the car over.